MOMMY LOVE ME

The suicide of the young transgender Leelah Alcorn has been running through my mind for a few days. here was a young boy that knew he wanted to be a woman and was not only denied but abused by his parents all because they had deep rooted Christian beliefs and views. It got to a point that they isolated her from school and even social media. They actually brought her to a therapist- a Christian one at that and all that managed to do was make her more depressed and suicidal. It’s a sad thing when any young life leaves this earth but this one hits home a lot more. You will always here me say I was never in the closet. To be honest a lot of it was because mommy was busy working and she always thought it would be a phase that I would grow out of.
You guys have no idea the multitude of men and women in my life journey that I have met that are tortured because they have heavily drenched religious family that cannot and won’t accept them. The embarrassment that the parents made their own children feel because they were gay. How they would tell their children that they are going straight to hell. That they are an embarrassment to the family. That if they are “possessed” by the spirit of lust and an abomination they can’t live in their house. So many of these kids are so young and being thrown out the house because mom or dad or both got a kid that didn’t come out the way they wanted.
I can never understand this. I immediately hear my mothers words- Una madre que tira so hijo en la calls no Es una madre!!!! My heart goes out to them. It’s hard just trying to make sense of life as you grow up let alone you identify yourself as gay. As a child or a teenager we automatically count on our parents to be there. To help us along the way. To help us try to make some sense of it. When our own parents greet us with the same abuse verbally and sometimes physically as our peers hopelessness becomes instant. It’s only within time that we have death as an option. It becomes the one thing that serves solace and peace. Then you have those that hide it in order to make their parents happy only to end up with a sense of self-hatred that is so embedded they become miserable till they in turn make another gay persons life a living hell.
I’m not here to say having a faith is wrong. It’s actually great to have faith in something greater than yourself but to not hold, embrace or love your child just because they are gay just doesn’t make sense. Saying that GOD wont accept them and they will forever be in the lake of fire and because of that you cant love them isn’t right. I don’t care what anyone says. It doesn’t even sound right, Don’t you think that they might as well get love from you before they are condemned? Don’t they understand that throwing us out in the street makes us worse. That we end up finding love somewhere that in all reality isn’t truly healthy and can put us more at risk. What I find even more funny is the child can de a drug addict, a jailbird or a thief but gay is unacceptable. When I finally told my mother that I was gay she told me she knew. She also told me that it’s not the life she wans for me but that she loves me no matter what. that I am her child. Those words meant so much to me. There is so much release in those words. There was so much safety in those words. After those words I knew that no matter what my mother had my back. To me that meant the world to me.let the world be the world as log as mommy loved me the rest of the world can kiss my ass. but unfortunately I was one of the lucky ones. there are still so many gay youth out there because of faith and religion re going through so much mental torture. parents, teachers, aunts, uncles please love them.

 

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